Effective January 1st, a controversial new law in California makes the creation of a fake Facebook account for the purposes of bullying a crime. The law targets criminal “e-personators” and addresses the original impersonation law which was written in 1872. Now, individuals who create fake profiles and email addresses to “harm, intimidate, threaten or defraud” someone online will be charged with a misdemeanor, fined up to $1,000, and may also serve jail time up to one year.

The law, authored by California State Senator Joe Simitian (D-Palo Alto), is in response to a growing trend of cyberbullying cases across the country in 2010, many of which led to tragic cases of suicide (or bullycide) including New Jersey teen Tyler Clementi, Massachusetts teen Phoebe Prince, and 13-year-old Texan Asher Brown.

“As a Silicon Valley legislator, I’m nothing but enthusiastic about technology. But the question is, is the technology used wisely and appropriately?” Simitian stated in a press release. “This (‘e-personation’) is one area where some constraint appeared necessary.”

New York and Texas have also recently updated their online harassment laws to include impersonation as a crime, although the Texan law applies only to social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace. Other states are likely to follow suit.

So, what does this mean for parents? First, parents must remember that kids who are bullied often don’t speak up because, among other things, they are afraid their Internet access will be cut off. In fact, CNN reports that only 5% of middle-schoolers tell their parents when they’ve been cyberbullied. For this reason, it’s important that parents be aware of the tell-tale signs that their child may be a victim of cyberbullying:

1.       Is your child depressed, angry, or moody?

2.       Does your child seem unusually withdrawn?

3.       Has your child fallen behind in school work lately?

4.       Does your child have a sudden lack of interest in school activities and friends?

5.       Is he or she jumpy after receiving an Instant Message, email, or text message?

6.       Is your child upset after using the computer or cell phone and seems afraid to use either?

7.       Have you noticed a change in your child’s sleep patterns (too much or too little)?

8.       What about a change in your child’s appetite (loss or gain)?

9.       Have you received strange phone calls or packages at your home?

10.   Are you aware of any bullying that your child engaged in previously?

Second, report it. If you suspect your child is a victim of cyberbullying, don't be afraid to contact your child’s school administrators and local authorities with evidence. For more information on parental tips regarding cyberbullying, check out our Pocket Guide for Parents of Bullied Kids. Also, please download a FREE cyberbullying poster for your community or school to help promote cyberbullying awareness and prevention.

Interested in more valuable information? Follow us (@SafetyWeb) on Twitter and like us on Facebook!

As this 'Mobile Year in Review' video from Mobile Future explains, mobile use is growing and is becoming the device of choice for youth to connect to the Web and to each other.

What's a Smartphone? What Parents Need to Know
Parents - if you've been thinking about getting your teen a smartphone this holiday season, make sure you're ready to take on the challenge of monitoring your child's smartphone usage to make sure they are using it wisely. One thing parents need to know about smartphones is that they are one part 'phone' plus another part 'mobile computer'. A smartphone is a mobile phone with advanced capabilities, and functions like the combination of a personal computer and a mobile phone, including voice calls, e-mails, text messaging, Internet access and mobile applications or 'apps'.

Untethered Access for Teens Requires Smart Parenting
Giving your child a smartphone is like giving them unrestricted access to the Web, social networks, instant messaging, a host of powerful applications plus voice and text message capabilities in the palm of their young hands. Anything your child can do on a home PC or laptop, they can likely also do with their smartphone -- but away from the watchful eyes of parents, and without any parental control software installed. While your child may have the digital smarts to navigate their smartphone to surf the Internet, check their Facebook wall, download the latest apps and text their friends all at once, they may lack the emotional maturity to understand the consequences of having such a powerful device.

Mobile Tips for Parent and Child
Make sure that you and your child have an explicit and, if necessary, written agreement for appropriate vs. restricted mobile usage. This includes any texting limits or calling restrictions you wish to impose, including rules about long-distance calls or text messages sent after hours or during class. If your child's school has a no texting policy, be sure your child is aware of it and adheres to it, as some schools will confiscate cellphones used against school policy. If you don't want your child to text in the middle of the night, have them 'check in' their cellphone to you before bedtime. Take advantage of cellphone usage controls from your mobile carrier or use the cell phone monitoring feature in SafetyWeb to enforce restricted hours. Talk about whether you'll allow texting or cellphone use during family time, at the dinner table, or while hosting family guests. One of the surest ways your child will learn proper cellphone etiquette is by your example and guidance.

Keeping It Safe with Open Communication
Make sure your child knows s/he can talk to you if anything uncomfortable arises as a result of using a smartphone, including if someone contacts them inappropriately online, sends them a 'sext message' or explicitly suggestive text message, or if they start to feel harassed through their cellphone in any way, even from a friend or boyfriend/girlfriend.

Set Usage Limits or Pay the Price
If your child is anything like the average teen, she's probably sending and receiving about 50 texts a day, or 1500 text messages a month -- with some teenage girls texting as much as 3,000 text messages each month. Unless you want to pay exorbitant texting fees, make sure your family plan has unlimited texting or set a maximum limit on monthly texts with your child so she can meter her usage accordingly.

How U.S. Teens Use Mobile Phones
Here are some interesting highlights from a recent Pew Internet study on Teens and Mobile Phones conducted by Amanda Lenhart:

- Text messaging or texting is on the rise and here to stay. Some 72% of US teens send and receive text messages.

- Parents text, too. Half of texting teens send messages to parents every day.

- Cell phones help bridge the digital divide: Teens from low-income households are much more likely than other teens to go online using a cell phone.

- Most schools treat the phone as a disruptive force that must be managed and often excluded from the school and the classroom.

- One in three (34%) texting teens ages 16-17 say they have texted while driving. That translates into 26% of all American teens ages 16-17.

- Sexting happens, but in a minority of cases: 4% of teens say they have sent a sexually suggestive nude or nearly nude image of themselves to someone via text message. 15% of teens say they have received a sexually suggestive nude or nearly nude image of someone they know by text.

- Texting is not just social - texting is used by teens for managing school-related purposes as well, with 70% of teens using text messaging to do things related to school work, and 23% of teens texting for school at least once a day.

For more statistics on teens and mobile usage, read Pew Internet's full report available from their site for download.

Mobile Parenting Is Simple with SafetyWeb
SafetyWeb makes mobile safety very simple for parents, with all-in-one activity reports for your child's social networking usage as well as mobile activity reports of your child's texting and cell phone call patterns. SafetyWeb's mobile monitoring feature works with all major wireless providers, and is included in every subscription (only $10 per month, or $100 for an annual plan).

If your child's mobile activity triggers an alert for unusual texting or calling activity, you'll be notified immediately via email or text message so you can further investigate online. Dramatic increases or decreases in texting or calling activity may warrant a conversation with your child as to why activity has changed suddenly over time. Changes could signal potential cyberbullying (as many incidents of online harassment are perpetrated over text messaging or cellphone calls by the bully), as well as new friendships or relationships (not all changes in activity are worrisome - but worth noticing, nontheless).

If your child is using their cellphone during agreed-upon hours of use, then there's probably no cause for concern. However, SafetyWeb will keep you informed if any social networking activity is worth looking into, with bully alerts, profanity alerts, depression alerts, adult friend alerts, and custom alerts specific to your child -- saving you time from having to read your child's every post - a fact that your teenager may eventually appreciate.

Source: Pew Internet Report by Amanda Lenhart, Teens & Mobile Phones

For more Social Networking Tips for Parents, visit our Parental control guides.

WHEN: Tuesday, December 14, 2010, 10:30 a.m. -1:30 p.m. EST
WHERE: McKinley Technology High School Auditorium, 151 T Street Northeast, Washington D.C., 20002
LIVE WEBCAST: Join online at http://reboot.fcc.gov/live
TWITTER: follow hashtag #GenMobile on Twitter
FORUM: Generation Mobile Questions Forum

The event brings together teens, parents, educators and experts to discuss the opportunities and challenges around mobile technology use by teens today.

Send your questions to livequestions@fcc.gov or participate in the online forum for Generation Mobile to add a question or vote on your favorite questions to ask the panel.

Generation Mobile will feature remarks by FCC Chairman Julius Genachowski and a presentation of findings from a Pew Internet and American Life study on kids' mobile phone usage.

The forum will include a panel of teens, parents and educators sharing their thoughts on mobile technology.

A second panel will focus on educating and empowering parents through an "Ask the Mobile Experts" session. The experts will also recommend tools and resources for parents and kids for the safe and responsible use of mobile phones.

Panelists and Speakers include:

Julius Genachowski, FCC Chairman
Rosalind Wiseman, Author of Queen Bees and Wannabes, basis for Mean Girls the movie
Tim Sparapani, Director of Public Policy, Facebook
Amanda Lenhart, Senior Research Specialist, Pew Research Center
Marsali Hancock, President, Internet Keep Safe Coalition
Michael Clark, Co-Founder, SafetyWeb
Maureen Cooney, Privacy Officer, Sprint
Stephen Balkam, CEO, Family Online Safety Institute
Alan Simpson, Vice President, Common Sense Media
and more!

The event is free and open to the public. Due to limited seating, those attending the event live are asked to pre-register by submitting their name, organizational affiliation and phone number to generationmobile@fcc.gov.

For more information see the press release on Generation Mobile.

Additional Resources:
Teens and Mobile Phones - A Resource Guide for Parents

ConnectSafely.org - Safety Tips for GPS Location Sharing

Pew Internet: Teens, Texting and Mobile Phones

If your child has any aspirations of running for political office at some point in her life, Wikileaks offers a great teaching moment about how one should manage his or her reputation – both online and offline – very closely. The wrong photo, video or comment, however innocent, may come back to haunt your child when she’s being vetted by Congress for the Presidency, or any political office for that matter – this includes diplomatic office. While fostering open conversation at home or in the classroom regarding the historical meaning of the Wikileaks events can be useful, publicly posting comments, 'Likes' for certain Facebook pages, or even negative opinions about a politically controversial topic like Wikileaks may make oneself vulnerable to possible surveillance, attack by online hackers defending Wikileaks, or political scrutiny.

This week’s Huffington Post article titled “State Department To Columbia University Students: DO NOT Discuss WikiLeaks On Facebook, Twitter” raised a red flag for those who might associate themselves via social network comments, tweets or blog postings about Wikileaks. A follow-up post by Change.org mentioned that the dean of Columbia's School of International and Public Affairs made a statement in response to the news stories that students were in fact free to discuss Wikileaks on social media, which seems more like a wise public relations move on behalf of the University, than prudent career advice to its future diplomats.

If there’s one thing that the recent Wikileaks controversy has brought to light, it’s that almost nothing – even super secret government diplomatic cables – remains private when information given to the wrong hands is ‘leaked’ online. Despite the fact that the Wikileaks site itself has been shut down, hundreds of ‘mirror’ or duplicate sites have popped up around the world. And once information is spread online – however true or untrue – it becomes nearly impossible to ‘retract’ that information and make it disappear, much to the dismay of the U.S. State Department.

If, instead of secret government cables, we were talking about a secret that your child had shared with her BFF on Facebook, a similar privacy fiasco could ensue. For example, if your child's BFF friendship goes sour and that trust is breached, it’s possible that your child’s former friend could turn into a cyberbully against her and publish confidential information or uncompromising photos, causing both emotional and reputational damage to your child.

Make sure your child is aware of the risks in sharing information on Facebook, photo sites and even text messages. Advise your child against posting anything online that would compromise her online reputation or your family's privacy if the information fell into the wrong hands. Even if your child's privacy settings are set to the strictest levels, make sure she's aware that anything she posts on a social network could be ‘breached’ and become public knowledge overnight.

Think before you post, and teach your child to do the same. Get SafetyWeb to be alerted automatically as soon as your child's privacy settings change, or his or her posts become worrisome and warrant further review.

Still, the news comes as a shock considering all the media attention that has been devoted to cyberbullying lately. Buzz about bullying grew tremendously in September when a freshman at Rutgers University named Tyler Clementi jumped to his death from the George Washington Bridge after two of his classmates filmed him having a sexual encounter with another man and then streamed the footage online.

So, what should you do if your child is bullied by cell phone or in cyberspace? Can you stop cyberbullying?

Here are some cyberbullying safety tips:

1.       Maintain an open door policy. Kids are often too scared to report bullying incidents. They may feel embarrassed, frightened, and even guilty that they did something wrong. Some kids are simply too scared to tell their parents for fear of their cell phone and Internet privileges being taken away.

2.       Don’t overreact. Try to evaluate the situation and be supportive of your child without immediately calling the school, but…

3.       Ask questions. Cyberbullying is not a joke. Find out if your child believes he/she is in actual physical danger. If a real threat has been made or there was already an assault, contact the school district and your local authorities immediately.

4.       Be understanding. Remember that words do hurt. Cyberbullying can be extremely cruel and more traumatizing than in-person bullying because it might be anonymous and it occurs 24/7. Your child may be truly suffering emotionally. Tell them that they are not alone.

5.       Never retaliate. Responding to a cyberbully is not recommended, as it can sometimes create more friction and increase the harassing incidents. Encourage your child to avoid retaliation whenever possible as well.

6.       Save the evidence. If things do escalate, you will need digital or hard copy records of the harassment to present to the police.

7.       Know your school’s policies. Most schools are mandated by the state to have policies on bullying, harassment and violence. Find out what your school’s policies are and hold them accountable for enforcing the rules.

8.       Monitor communications. Learn who your child is communicating with both online and via cell phone. The easiest way of doing this is by using an Internet monitoring service (like SafetyWeb). Watch closely for the warning signs that cyberbullying is continuing or becoming more frequent.

9.       File a complaint. If the harassment takes place via cell phone, trace the number and contact the cell phone carrier. If the bullying occurs online, you can contact the site’s administrator or Internet service provider.

10.   Get the “Find Help” Facebook app. SafetyWeb has launched a helpful new tool for users to easily report inappropriate behavior or content online. Kids can bookmark the app and then click “Find Help” to be directed to useful phone numbers and links for reporting incidents.

11.   Consider counseling. If your child is exhibiting signs of depression or anger, consult with your family physician or a behavioral health professional for advice on further treatment.

Download a FREE cyberbullying poster for your community or school and help promote cyberbullying awareness and prevention.

Interested in more Parental control tips? Follow us (@SafetyWeb) on Twitter and like us on Facebook!

Hey, your child’s a “good kid.” Nothing to worry about…

Okay, so maybe you’ve noticed that he or she has been glued to a cell phone lately, but c’mon, what kid isn’t?!  Besides, they only send text messages to their friends once in a blue moon… right?

Actually, not quite.

According to a new report released by Nielsen, American teenagers between the ages of 13 and 17 send approximately 3,339 text messages per month. Girls send an unbelievable amount of text messages at 4,050 per month while boys send only 2,539 per month.

This study illustrates two important facts: 1) With numbers this high, teens are obviously becoming extremely dependent on their devices… dare we say addicted to the texting habit? and 2) Because voice-calling is not as important to teens anymore (and certainly not utilized as frequently as text messaging), parents now have more reasons to consider monitoring their child’s cell phone activity. (We call this "Mobile Monitoring" and it can be done from anywhere).

Let’s be honest. Unless you physically have your child’s cell phone in your hands and start to futz around- poking and prying- you won’t hear or see much of anything. With all the stories about sexting, cyberstalking, cyberbullying, textual harassment, and more in the news lately, it’s more important than ever for parents to be “in the know” about who their child is communicating with via cell phone and what type of content is being sent and received.

Tell us your thoughts. Do you think teens send too many text messages? Do you worry about your child's texting habits? What do you think is the best solution?

Interested in more? Follow us (@SafetyWeb) on Twitter and like us on Facebook!

SafetyWeb Mobile Monitoring is included in every SafetyWeb subscription, and shows your child's mobile phone call and mobile text message activity. It's never been easier to know who is calling and texting your child, and whom your child is calling and texting. Also know what times your child is using their mobile phone to call and text their friends, and be alerted if they are using their phone at inappropriate or restricted time periods.

SafetyWeb monitors mobile phones on all major wireless networks, including Verizon, AT&T Wireless, Sprint, and T Mobile. Simply log in to your SafetyWeb account and connect your child's mobile phone details.

Don't have a SafetyWeb account yet? Perform a free search for a sample report to see what profiles your child has online.

If your kids are 11-17, congrats! You've made it to the Major League of parenting. With little ones, you didn't need fancy plays since you called all the shots. Now... it's all nuance and negotiation.

As t(w)eens step up and make more of their own decisions, parents need to gradually step back. But your job's not done yet! Kids still need us to be plugged in and monitoring their physical, social and emotional well-being. In fact, as active citizens of the digital world, they need us more than ever.

But when does conscientious monitoring cross the line and become disrespectful and intrusive? Good question! Hold that thought.

Just for the record, if you've got evidence or a vague sense that your child is engaging in harmful activities or is being hurt, threatened or harassed, monitor the situation very closely. Act on your gut. Question your kid at length. Tell what you know, suspect and fear. Dig deep and don't give up until you get to the bottom of what's going on. Then offer your strongest support, providing your child the help (s)he needs and follow up!

But what if nothing's going on? How closely should you monitor then? I often hear from good, drug-free kids, who get excellent grades. They're indignant because Mom/Dad snoop through their email and cell phones for no known reason. They're exhausted by a so-called Velcro parent who can't let go and constantly texts and phones their kids all the day.

In case you're thinking: "I have the right to check in with my kid whenever I want and to know everything my kid's doing at all times!" With all due respect, if you don't have probable cause for poking into the personal exchanges your kids have with their peers, you shouldn't. All kids, especially teens, have the right to a degree of privacy.

How much privacy? How much freedom? At what age? Depends. I don't know your child or his track record for making responsible choices when you're not around. Besides, parenting isn't a science, it's an art. We're all artists, trying to figure out how to use our tools to launch a masterpiece, ie. a fully functioning young adult. Unfortunately, there are no easy answers. But the most effective parents create and maintain healthy boundaries with their kids.

In 21st Century parent-speak the word "boundaries" often means "rules." As in: Parents set up the rules and the kids (hopefully) comply. This top-down, one-way approach can lead to rebellion in the ranks. Family rules are part of any discussion of boundaries, but the fact is, healthy boundaries are a two-way street. Our personal boundaries deserve respect and so do our kids'.  For example:

• You politely inform your 13 year old she can't go out with her friends because she didn't keep her agreement to finish her homework first. Furious, she blasts you with a choice sampling from her name-calling inventory.  Boundary alert!  Your daughter disrespected you. She must receive a consequence from you so she doesn't think for one minute that what she did is acceptable behavior.
• Your 14 year old mumbles something about Coach being a "jerk" for not letting the boy start in tomorrow's game. Incensed, you grab your phone. Your son shouts, "Don't! I'll handle it!" Ignoring him, you call Coach and give the "jerk" an earful. Double Boundary alert! By disregarding your son's wishes, you disrespected him. You also rudely overstepped your parenting role by intervening between coach and student.

We all want our kids' respect. That's why we've got to hold them accountable for respecting our boundaries. While we're at it, we need to respect their boundaries too. Great advice, though not always easy to follow. But like I said, parenting is an art... you've got to practice to improve. Besides, we're not looking for perfection, just progress.

Happy Parenting!

In friendship,

Annie

To read more advice from Annie, visit her blog at AnnieFox.com or check out some of her books, including Too Stressed to Think? and the new Middle School Confidential™ series.

Kids are not always open to the idea of reporting a bullying incident, whether they are a victim or a bystander. Many children think that telling a trusted adult may result in their computer or cell phone privileges being taken away. Dr. Jorge Srabstein, the Medical Director of the Clinic for Health Problems Related to Bullying at Children’s National Medical Center who testified before Congress about cyberbullying, said, “Unfortunately, it’s universally ingrained that reporting bullying is being a ‘snitch’ and trying to get someone in trouble.”

As parents, we need to work on changing that way of thinking. “Kids need to know that adults take their reports of bullying seriously and are responsive,” said Annie Fox to a concerned parent at last week’s Twitter party about online and mobile safety, alongside SafetyWeb and 5MinutesforMom. Fox has experience with issues just like this. As an educator, award-winning author, and long-time online adviser to parents and teens, she began an anti-bullying campaign on Facebook called Cruel’s Not Cool for concerned students, parents, teachers, and administrators who want to take action against bullying. The group’s slogan is “No one solution to bullying fits all.”

If your child is currently a victim of bullying or cyberbullying, check out “Annie’s 10 Tips to Help Kids Survive Mean Girls and Guys,” originally posted on Annie Fox’s website:

1. This is NOT your fault. You haven’t done anything that deserves this kind of meanness.
2. You are not alone. Unfortunately lots of kids have to deal with this every day.
3. Don’t suffer in silence. Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on. I can help. Together we can let the school know what’s happening and make sure they put a stop to it. If you absolutely can’t/won’t talk to me about it, you have to talk to a trusted adult at school. (Note: Targeted kids may resist all help. They may believe that bringing attention to the problem will make things worse for them. You have to assure them that while there may be some temporary social consequences for speaking up, by staying silent there is little chance that the situation will improve on its own.)
4. Find at least one friend you can trust. It’s easier to put up with mean kids with someone on your side.
5. Do NOT try to retaliate. Even though you’re hurt and frustrated and angry enough to explode, do NOT try to get back at the mean kids. Meanness only turns into more meanness. That’s how wars escalate. Seriously! Instead of “getting even” speak up for yourself by telling an adult who has some power to make things better.
6. This isn’t about you. Happy, self-confident kids do NOT target others just for the fun of it. Mean kids often have problems. And major insecurities. They pick on other kids to make themselves feel more powerful. If their lives really were all that “prefect” they wouldn’t get pleasure out of making others miserable.
7. You can’t control what they do, what they say, what they think. Don’t even bother. You can’t control the choices others make. You only get to control your own choices.
8. Choose not to let them get to you. Mean kids say mean things. Words are the weapons they use. Their words can hurt, but they are just words. When you start believing the rubbish they say about you, then you are using their weapons against yourself. Don’t go there!
9. Get involved in activities outside of school. Follow your interests and your self-esteem will soar.
10. Real friends are trustworthy, respectful, supportive, loyal. Be the kind of friend you want to have and real friends will find you.

Interested in more? Follow us on Twitter (@SafetyWeb) and like us on Facebook!

If you missed all the fun, here’s a quick rundown of some of the topics we discussed with @Annie_Fox (educator, author and teen/parent expert) and @5minutesformom (online bloggers and founders of the go-to mommy website):

• Responding to school bullying and cyberbullying
• Should children speak up if they know about a bullying incident?
• What age is appropriate for cell phones?
• How can a parent “pry” a cell phone away from a child?
• Is teen blogging a good thing?
• What is the best way to monitor a child’s Facebook account? What about their cell phone?
• Parenting techniques- what works?
• Tips on how to start conversations with your child
• The importance of online and mobile safety education

“It's a process, this parenting thing. An art, not a science. Lead with your heart, and LISTEN more than you talk (to tweens),” explained Annie Fox during the party, “Talk to your kids about your life too. If you want them to open up to you, be open (appropriately of course) with them.” Words to live by.

You can also read the full SafetyWeb Twitter party transcript online.

For more information on Annie Fox, visit her website at www.anniefox.com, and don’t forget to bond with other moms at www.5MinutesforMom.com.

Interested in more? Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook!